Wednesday, August 6, 2008


I can't stand it. I was just browsing through the news stories on the 1010WINS site, when I came across an item that absolutely blew me away.

Now I hope you're all sitting down for this deeply important information. It seems that Paris Hilton did a spoof political commercial which has something or other to do with a John McCain commercial (let's all remember that I am an almost total non-television watcher). Anyway, the point of this "news story" was that Ms. Hilton - wait for it - MEMORIZED HER ENTIRE MONOLOGUE!

Yes, people, this was in the 1010WINS news. Granted it was in the Entertainment section, and granted that I'm sure this was an amazing feat for Ms. Hilton (particularly since I wasn't actually aware she could read) - but what with one thing and another, do we really need this kind of nonsense cluttering up the news?

Other than that, I have something upwards of nothing to report...I still can't get elected dogcatcher, and just to add insult to injury, I submitted my picture and resume for background work which requested "West Village resident types" - and nobody called me. Personally, I think I'd be perfect as a West Village resident type - given the fact that I'm a West Village resident, you know. Unfortunately, I have a horrible feeling that they're looking for this week's types - i.e., all the young girls with their miniature dustmops which they fondly refer to as dogs, and all the young Wall Street gents. I would call these West Village transients, not residents (they get married and move to the suburbs, you know), but then I'm not casting a movie. Of course, the one I'm really annoyed about that I didn't get a call for is the one which requested "haggard bar drunks." Now, come on, people. That's PERFECT for me!

Meanwhile, since nobody else seems to want me, I'm off on the stage audition trail again - the only problem with which is that while I can get $130 a day as a background player in a movie, one of the things I'm auditioning for will pay me $378 a week. You gotta love Actors Equity - still the same pay rates as when it was formed in - I think - 1912.

On a totally different subject, I have a peculiar quirk - well, actually I've got lots of them - but I hate, hate, hate it when people don't use the proper plates and cutlery for their meals. This, of course, has to do with I know perfectly well he wasn't brought up this way (what with his mother being my aunt and all), and it drives me completely nuts to see him using a Corning Ware casserole dish, for instance, to eat spaghetti out of. We have PLATES! Given my habit of giving humongous parties, we have TONS of plates! USE A DAMN PLATE!

I am not, I may add, a fanatic on the subject - if dinner is a salad, casserole and rolls, I see no reason why you need a salad plate and a salad fork and a butter plate and a butter knife, etc., etc., etc. (even if I happen to prefer a salad plate because I dislike salad dressing in my casserole). I mean, the whole point of a meal like that is ease in cooking and serving. BUT, damn it, pie is eaten with a fork, not a soupspoon (fork and teaspoon if it's a la mode), and vegetables are served in vegetable dishes if the meal is at all formal. Really.

Hey! Do you think this sort of thing is why (along with my horror of blue jeans, T-shirts and flip-flops at a Broadway theatre) I have some old friends who refer to me as the world's only living Victorian beatnik?

Love, Wendy (mistress of the bizarre segue)

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