It Never Rains But It Pours

I know, I know, I haven't been around. That's because my life has been dull enough for me living through it, let alone inflicting it on other people. See how I take care of you?

All of a sudden events are flying thick and fast...I think I like this, but it's getting a little crowded in my life.

First of all (and let us all keep our fingers VERY tightly crossed), Joshua actually has a plane reservation for this coming Tuesday! I know - I don't believe it either. He has managed to put the better part of his worldly goods in storage, too, and I'm beginning to remember than I do, in fact, have a living room, and not a cardboard box depot.

However (one must appease the various gods), I am not going to believe this departure until I see it. Considering that all this was supposed to take place last January, you can understand my very natural skepticism. Until I see Joshua and his suitcase actually getting into an airport car service and disappearing around the corner, I'm not going to celebrate. At that point, however, I think I'll go out and buy myself a lobster and a bottle of champagne.

(A brief aside for no good reason - I was reading a recipe this evening that went on about lobster and heavy cream and a truffle and then said, "One quarter cup butter or margarine." Who in the HELL mentions margarine in the same breath with lobster, truffles and heavy cream?)

Now on Monday, while Joshua is sure to be performing his celebrated horrendous nuisance act (remember, this is the guy who can't deal with packing tape...you can imagine what's going to happen when he suddenly realizes he's going halfway around the world), I have the professional cleaning crew coming in around noon. They are going to start by doing the bathroom and the powder room and, thank God, my awful kitchen. Six years of Joshua deep frying everything but the cat has left a layer of grease that I can't budge with anything, and God knows I've been trying.

And then at 6:30 pm (this from a phone call I got tonight), my playwright and director are coming over and we're going to start rehearsals for my one woman show.

Meanwhile I have to get up at 4:30 tomorrow morning and get my adorable little rear end to a midtown hotel by 6:30 am for another one of those ghastly seminar things. Yeah. Nine lousy hours at $12 an hour. By the time the taxes come out, it's barely worth getting out of bed for (which I know I say every time, but there you are...it's true).

I must say Joshua is being very good to me. He has solved the problem of my perhaps vaguely missing him once he's gone (well, you know what they say about some people needing a visible irritant) by being at his MOST annoying recently. He decided that he needed copies of a large amount of very old (like 1987) publicity about a job he'd done, but naturally he couldn't figure out how to copy this stuff. Then he needed some photographs scanned, but he couldn't...yeah, you get the picture. He has been nagging me about this for ages, so I finally did that today. Yesterday, just for funsies, he was having more trouble doing something on the computer. Now I'm sitting in the kitchen with Sarah and Vicky and Shai, and we're laughing and scratching and drinking beer and hanging out...and Joshua tramps right on in there to tell me he needed my help with the computer. No excuse me, no sorry to interrupt you, no nothing. And he did it THREE TIMES!

Oh, and he told me that he's planning to come back to New York in about a year to do something or other, and he'll be staying with me for a month. I have no problem with his decision...as long as he gives me enough lead time to stay with that order of nuns while he's in town. And no, I'm not giving him my new address (when I get one).

Bring on Tuesday! I am now going to bed and am probably going to have serious nightmares about the number of almost fatal diseases Joshua can come down with between now and Tuesday.

Love, Wendy